WE NEED MORE TYPES OF CHICKEN

As I begin typing this on one computer, I'm watching the eternally slow credits roll for Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood on the other. I have officially completed the main single-player campaign of the game, but not even close to all the side quests in the game. That was not my choice however, as it turns out the ending of the game is thrust upon you rather quickly.

Buried somewhere underneath the fullscreen credits roll on the other ocmputer, I had been keeping a journal of all of my experiences while playing Assassin's Creed: Grilled, making observations about certain events in the game and how they related to Original Recipe and Extra Crispy. It's chock full of SPOILERS, but it's the most complete summary of my thoughts on the game, so if you don't mind a leg-numbing read, here it is.

If you're not up for the spoilers, but still want my general impressions on the game, let me say this: It feels like it was way too short, and not necessarily in a way that left me wanting more. I don't have it perfectly divvied up, but I would imagine that I probably spent about as much time on the billions of sidequests as on the actual points relating to the plot. In fact, even some of the points to the plot felt like they were sidequest material that got tacked onto the main plotline just to make it longer. To be honest, I don't feel like I got my money's worth with the single-player campaign alone.

Oh, and I figured out why they call Rome "The Eternal City": It's because you never leave Rome the entire game. Am I the first to use that joke? I hope so. I've had that in the back of my mind for a while now.

Fortunately, the game's primary selling point was the new multiplayer mode, which I can pleasantly describe as absolutely fascinating chaos. I only squeezed about an hour or two of the multiplayer in so far, but I look forward to returning to play some more. In the multiplayer mode I played (Wanted), you're randomly assigned another player to kill. Meanwhile, other people might be searching for you to kill. Run around for ten minutes trying to rack up points (with bonuses for stealthy kills), high score wins. It's as simple as that, but the specially-made maps feel like you're playing a real-world game of Pac-Man. If there's one thing I don't fully appreciate, it's that veteran players are blessed with special weapons and tools that aren't ever even explained to the noob player, making it a bit frustrating at times, since it's hard to know exactly why your attacker killed you or why your target escaped you in the way they did. Still, it's an overall fun romp and I'd say that the multiplayer makes up for a large portion of the shortcomings in the single-player.

But I guess I still have to make some sort of verdict, don't I? Well, if the game allows it (pending these bloody credits ever finish), I would not be opposed to going back and clearing more of the side missions I missed out on, now that I know I can't endanger my chances of accidentally running into the end of the game anymore. I would happily spend more time playing multiplayer. But would I recommend buying this game at full price? Probably not. If anything, it feels like it's more of a bridge to the final game, Assassin's Creed... Popcorn Chicken? Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood is only really good as a sum of its three parts (the single-player campaign, the single-player sidequests, and the multiplayer mode), but it's hard for the former two to stand on their own without the multiplayer holding them up.

Will I play Assassin's Creed: Revelations? At this point, I guess I have no choice but to finish up the series. I don't know if it'll be again on Steam or perhaps a legitimate console... Let's just say we'll wait and see what Black Friday brings.